Sunday, November 30, 2008

Going to sleep

Believe it or not, baru je nak crawl into bed since last night.

After ended the event, which thankfully went better than we expected after all the horrors that went down, decided to call it an early night. Sort of. Went to grab a bite at the post event, and then mamak kat Cheras ngan Syarol.

Wanted to head back to catch some Zs tapi da ngantuk sangat, sempat sampai kat Shah Alam je, pull over kat a petrol station tidur jap. Matilah kejap katanya, bangun pun da almost 7am! Mak aih... sempat aku tidur dalam hampir empat jam.

Terserlah keletihan akibat tidur a total of tiga jam je in 48 hours.

So how did the show go? Well... I would be biased in any of my comments. But I have to say my favourite performances were the opening act in Datuk Siti Nurhaliza - walaupun Kurik Kundi lagu lama, but it's still a good song plus rindu show dia yang all out camni, and the closing in Ning Baizura with the James Bond theme songs medley.

The Mamma Mia! tribute was decent too, with Zahid, Nita, Dafi and Suki doing better in the show than in the rehearsals.

The other bits were just somewhere between so-so and horrendous.

Dalam kesibukan sempat snap a few pics. Siap ngan camera lagik, tak malas pakai phone je.

Kavita sibuk with her Blackberry


Van Fan @ Fan Yi Chen, the star of Cape No. 7 - Taiwan biggest blockbuster of all time after Titanic


Tanaka Chie - remember her for the bit role in Initial D


Sisters Siti and Saida. So sweet both of them


Erra looking like a hot momma as usual


Abang Zulhuzaimy pas show persembahan lagu dari pementasan teater Impak Maksima The Musical


The couple, Zahid and Nita


Melly - wow she looks like Mas meets Missy Elliot


Tamara - Rama from Cicakman 2


Fahrin sempat camwhoring


Vee and Shidi


So that was KLIFF 2008, guys. A bit of drama here and there with a star bringing her entourage (orang luar), presenters yang show up just as the show started and much more events I will not state here.

Still, it was a fun learning experience for me tuk kerja sebalik tabir dalam disiplin yang aku tak penah cuba, so I cherish the experience.

Now I really need to recuperate from it...

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Holy...#$%^!!!

Damn! It's been a damn busy two days. I am seriously tired out. Semalam had to finish off the script, and with last minute changes and all, had to stay overnight and work things out with my fellow scriptwriter, Saniboey - aka the bimbo himself. Korang baca blog dia tau la dia molot poaka cam aku gak.

Cuma aku skang da insaf. Leh? Heh... beriya je insaf. Matilah ko...

But it was kind of fun, and it was my first real participation as a scripwriter in a live show, and was partly responsible for shaping the approach towards the show - well as far as a script could allow.

Worked closely with Sarimah - who was the host for the Kuala Lumpur International Film Festival, which was a blessing cause while everyone has different ideas and approaches, it is definitely easier working with friends. Ditto for Saniboey as well.

Masa rehearsal, I think I seriously spaced out because there were so many things that needed to be reworked, with many last minute changes coming our way. Tapi dalam pening, ok gak sebab had great people to keep my mind on track of what had to be done.

Sarimah losing it during the rehearsals.. things can get a little mad...


I think Zahid spaced out like me too.


And you thought this job was in any way glamourous? My view of the stage

After rehearsals were done, decided had a lot of work to do to clean up and tighten the script as well as repair the gaping holes left by the many changes.

I headed home, grabbed some stuff at about midnight, and about 2am was back at the hotel. Bimbo and I worked from about 3am, and completed everything was past 8am.

Memasing da ngantuk, tapi nak wat camna kan... tried to sleep but couldn't cause was hooked on watching CNN for their coverage of the Mumbai attacks.

A bimbo at work. The one on the phone lah. This was sometime noon when final changes were made. Dalam pic tu Azreen, wife Saniboey


Still managed to doze off about 9am, and woke up two hours later. After one last round of changes, had to finish off the cue cards and stuff. Besides was bloody hungry so went to grab lunch.

Before you know it, it was time to get ready.

More last minute changes


With last minute changes made, here and there, it was havoc and chaos as everyone began changing while making sure everything was going to go fine.

It takes this much for the transformation... and more...


Tuh dia gigih. Sambil wat rambut dan make-up sekali, leh lagik add her personal bits to the script. Rajin kak Mah


Finally managed to grab a bite, shower and head on down with Syarol who was my guest to lepak to watch the show. Dia belot jap, dari biasa support Dayang nak cheer on for Siti katanya.

Argh... still panicky. Will post more on the show and how it went later.

Friday, November 28, 2008

Cerita lahar

Saja nak update sebelum gi PWTC ni tuk kerja sikit berkaitan Kuala Lumpur International Film Festival.

Smalam, masa kat Mid Valley, aku heading to the car park nak amik keta. Ngan peluh sebab ramai orang, and the rain - causing it to be panas semacam, aku da memang tak selesa. Plus lagik orang langgar-langgar time jalan, gesel sana gesel sini. Biasalah... aku kan claustrophobic.

Masa kat area panggung wayang tuh, dekat McDonalds tuh, aku jalan ikut this path la yang orang ulang alik nak ke arah parking. Dekat ngan desserts counter tuh, tetiba ada tiga orang betina gila kemaruk sundae cone kot yang pendek ala hobbit, berhenti tengah jalan suddenly sambil feeling speaking semacam nak order apa. So damn bimbo - nak order ice cream pon cam nak look for a cure for cancer.

Now, when you stop in the middle of where people are supposed to be walking, ngan ramai orang lagik, or course collision course la kan?

Aku sempat elak, tapi cam brush shoulders ngan two of them. Aku irritated gila, tapi diam je.

Belum aku menapak selangkah lagi, aku dengar one of the girls exclaim, "Excuuuuuuuuseeeeeee meee!!!!" perli aku.

Motif???? Ko tak reti nak ke tepi, orang jalan ko nak stop pose perhal??? Pastu nak konsep carut aku lak.

Aku on reflex (sebab pantang dicarut dan juga sebab my phobia memang getting to me da), turned around and practically screamed,

"Yeah? Then don't f**king stand in the middle of where people are walking! F**king bitch!!!!"

Ngan pose libas rambut yang baru dua inci aku, I stormed off while people terdiam keliling area tuh. Amik ko! Ko nak berangan nak carut aku padahal ko bodoh, ko yang salah, kena sedas dari aku free.

The lesson here?



McDonalds Sundae Cone - RM1.20. Getting f**ked by me in public sebab bodoh sombong nak mampos - PRICELESS!

Heh... geram sangat. Tapi aku on the way ke carpark tuh leh gelak sorang. Hilang semua stress suddenly. Now that was a real release. Puas terus.

Hah.. nak cita lahar lagik satu.

Siang tadi meter reader TNB singgah umah. Tapi dia tak bunyikan door bell ke panggil ke apa. Dia pakai binoculars nak amik meter reading. Kelas!!!!

Orang tua aku ajak dia masuk tuk amik reading, but dia decline. Sampai dua tiga kali orang tua aku mintak dia masuk baru in the end dia masuk nak check.

Th first print out bill was for over RM700!!! Aiyo! Gila ke??? Ko hengat rumah aku ni kilang ke?

Pas dia da check and reprint a new bill - it was about RM200 saja.

Ngan muka cover malu, dia sengih dan kata, "Taip masuk salah salah lah yang keluar" sebelum handover the bill and cabut. Like what the....

Yeay.. stupidity is contagious and ignorance is bliss. Don't get it? Owh nevermind. Heh... ok la.. nak gi wat keja sat.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

M-IFW

Semalam relax sikit, so took up Faz's offer to join her for the Malaysian International Fashion Week 2008 at The Garden, Mid Valley. She was opening for Hatta Dolmat's collection. Bukan setakat opening je, she was his muse. Meaning of course, she was sort of his inspiration for his collection.

First show dia ni for the Bumiputra Designers Association show, and ada lagik satu on Saturday for envy magazine kalao tak silap aku.

Motif, aku pun nak feeling muse pakai pas masuk camni?


Anyway, it was max fun definitely sebab ramai sangat kengkawan about. Firstly there were the designers - who were all freakily flustered. Biasalah backstage time nak show je, ada je yang tak kena and panik merata. But things went pretty well except for a mistake in the running order, and a stupid model running into me and blaming me for being in her way padahal aku dok tepi dia yang ting tong. Heh... kalao accident langgar pokok mesti salahkan pokok kan?

Secondly fun sebab ada Liyana, Irma Hasmie and some other friends... fun sangat dapat lepak camni once in a while.

Anyway, congrats to Hatta for a very good collection. His attention to details has improved a lot, and I can see a shift in the aesthetics of many of the designers, with a more refined look to their collections. This includes Wanie, Nik, Anizam and Zery (paling improved aku rasa dari semua segi tapi tetap menggunakan koleksi Wangsuri kan!!! - matilah aku!)

Two of the collection yang menarik minat aku which I didn't expect was Khairi Sufi and Amir Luqman. Khairi especially menarik sebab dia sorang je tak muted collection dia. He was the only one that went all out with colours and used them well. Plus he has a certain flair and potential yang fresh sangat.

Hatta and two of his models


Faz and Liyana Jasmay (la la la la la la la la... sing with me.. !!! - matilah aku!)


Waheeda pun ada


Craziness


Aku tak up for a lot of picture taking. Malas sangat. So sorry for the lack of pics.

Pas finish, we went for a bite at Alexis I think, and bumped into Sazzy, Dynas, Irma. Lola and her friends joined for makan, before temankan Faz gi shopping tuk barang keperluan (katanya) for her little holiday coming up.

Give me strength... no more handbags... no more handbags...


So we spent time running for her 'essentials' from MNG, then to Zara, then to pick up some stationery, then back to MNG.

Total haul - one bag, a pair of boots, a knit sweater, a leather jacket, and I think a top or two. I lose count. Heh... Aduh.. another earlu night.

Esok ada rehearsal for Kuala Lumpur International Film Festival which I'm also involved in. So kena spend whole day at PWTC. Seb baik ada Sarimah nak keep company since she gonna host the show. Ok la... until tomorrow's entry...


PS - Saw this book at MPH. Was torn between getting it or not. Balik baca sample and reviews... not bad. Amir cepat beli buku nih! Aku leh pinjam dari ko. Heh... me too many books da nak beli this month.


The Wackiest I Would I Do to Race for N96

Have you guys ever wondered how I'd look in drag?

Well I have been in drag before obviously. Two most public events, was firstly the Anugerah Juara Lagu final in Stadium Bukit Jalil in a full authentic and very tight nyonya kebaya to launch my gossip column as a satire of how gossip columns always appear to be run by well, auntie looking characters, and second at the Akademi Fantasia media appreciation night where I went in too high heels and a baby doll dress as Velvet during the fourth season.

Well I'm entering and have been shortlisted for the second round of Nokia N96 Race to win the phone and and a trip for two to Phuket.

The event, held by Nuffnang,will be held on 6 December in Kuala Lumpur, and those who qualify from the online race, which is through postings like this, will win a Nokia N96 which will be used to navigate during the day of the race.

So the guys at Nuffnang askedwhat's the wackiest thing I would do for an N96?

Simple, I'd look fabulous, with the highest heels on(not wacky yet) and run around KL navigating myself with a Nokia N96 AND win it too, looking awesome. That's better promotion that any other wacky stunt will get.

I wanted to include pics of how I looked before, but I think I'll just see if they take up on my offer as a contestant. Trust me, the surprise is VERY much worth it.

After all - wouldn't you want to see a gorgeous six foot amoi, running around trying to win a trip to Phuket?

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Stress!!!!

Sebenarnya malas sangat nak update blog nih. Bukan pe... tension sangat. Yes, people, it's that time of the month again where I have the blues and depression just washes over me for no reason.

Hormonal imbalance tol aku ni.

Semalam memang depressed nak mampos, very gloom and doom. I supposed it was a combination of everything, from the weather, to the traffic chaos to my personal issues.

Tapi sempat gak smalam ada comic relief masa time lepak ngan Faz, Juan dan Jue. Ada lah nak ke meeting potential endorser for Faz gituh. Sapa takleh sebut. Nanti jer kang confirm baru leh cita.

Anyway... masa caught in the jam nih, Faz perasan nih. Sempat gelak sat. Perasan tak keta belah kiri tuh? Kesian kain makcik tuh sangkut.



Today wasn't any better. Siang nak gi ada kerja sikit pun leh accident sikit. Minor je, tapi enough tuk sakitkan hati ler.

That and several other episodes yang memang try my patience gila babs punya.

Won't go on.

The ok part of the day was the actual work itself for today which was doing some interviewing, centred around one of my favourite singers masa kecik dulu, Francissca Peter.

Memang best la lepak nak interview ngan Fran. Dia ngan adik dia Bibiana memang molot leh tune skali ngan aku. There was just endless stuff to talk about. Or maybe I ranted on and on... but either way, I'd never formally introduced myself to her, so kira sesi perkenalan gak la.

Bibiana and Fran - adorable sisters


We wrapped everything by about 5pm. Phew... letih siot dari pagi.

Still pala berat smacam so decided to lepak 1 Utama sat ngan Juan nak de-stress. Saja je lepak Starbucks jap, serempak with Zizi Suria FM dan member. Borak ler sat (more like ngumpat)

And then just walked around. Interesting pics of the day (menarik ke??)

Nama yang unik - me like!


Hah... call me ignorant, but tak penah tengok sotong besau dari itik dan ayam da memang supersized.


Calling it an early night. Tons of work to sift through, and mood still down. Things will be back to normal soon... I hope.


PS - Just finished watching episode 10 of Heroes. Damn!!! Things getting more interesting by the episode.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Facebook

Just a short note. Kan aku da cakap I will only add friends from the Press and the entertainment industry into my personal Facebook account?

It's even stated where I put the link below, tapi I guess some people don't read before they click to add.

Well, since ramai lebih aktif Facebook that myspace, and want to keep in touch there, what say you, korang join the klubbkidd.com Facebook group? Just CLICK HERE to join.

Hope you guys understand I cannot just add anyone not in this business due to the sensitivity and the need for privacy among my friends ok. Kalao korang add meka sendiri ok la. But malaih aku kang through me, pics ke comments yang sibuk jadik bahan kang. Thanks for understanding. Be posting an entry later. Busy day ahead...

Monday, November 24, 2008

Video day

Arghhh! Think I'm suffering from retinal burn for staring into my laptop for so long.

Tried to get work done, and deviated a little to spend a whole load of time watching the 2008 American Music Awards. Not that the results really mattered.

Who cares about Chris Brown or Miley Cyrus? Buckets of puke ahoy! Anyone who thinks those two names are better than Alicia Keys or any of the other nominated acts, are really whacked. I mean Coldplay loses out to Brown for Artist of the Year? You've got to be joking right? Anyone's better than him...

Consolation was his girlfriend, Rihanna, won categories for the women, after fighting tooth and nail.For the second year, winners were determined by online voting. They used to be decided by a poll of 20,000 music buyers, now it's online voting to get more people to watch and apparently it's worked with a total of 11.8 million viewers for the 2008 AMAs, up from 10.9 million the year before.

While the awards ceremony itself was so-so, it was the performances that made the show worth watching. Again forget the likes of Miley or New Kids On The Block who recycled their same crap from a decade ago.

Most soulful performance would have to go to Alicia Keys, who was joined along by Queen Latifah and Kathleen Battle for Superwoman. Undoubtedly, Superwoman, and the live rendition of it, justified why she won both for both the Pop/Rock and Soul/RB album categories.



The performance that seemed to work up the crowd though was Christina Aguilera's for a non stop mix that opened with Keeps Gettin' Before it moved on to a medley of her past hits. So she wasn't in top vocal form, but considering she pulled out the stops in her performance with Genie In A Bottle, Dirrrty, Ain't No Other Man and Fighter, it was a pretty damn good performance.



Visually (not vocally - as expected, but who cares) was the PussyCat Dolls performance of I Hate This Part and When I Grow Up.




Vocally superb but boring as hell for bringing the performance style of the Nineties into the end of the first decade of the millenium was Mariah Carey who won an honorary award that night.



Best performance of the night I suppose however would go to Beyonce for All The Single Ladies.



By the way, did you catch the Saturday Nite Live - Justin Timberlake parody of Beyonce's video? Yes, we're talking JT in tights and heels! Can't find the full version, but this one on Youtube is spliced with the original music video in the mix.



Anyhoo, back to Rihanna. I loved her outfit during her performance. It was so.. ernm.. spiky!!! She'd taken off the neck piece in the pic, but watch the video performance of Rehab.






On the subject of Rihanna, she's now the face of Gucci! Rihanna is nowpromoting its new Tattoo Heart Collection, which will see 25 per cent of every purchase go towards UNICEF.
Watch the ad below.






Now got to get back to work....

By the way, my song of the moment is Beyonce's If I Were A Boy, which I guess the 'if' doesn't apply to me, last time I checked. Matilah kau... but lyrics dia memang best gila. Enjoy.. and be posting tomorrow...


Sunday, November 23, 2008

Youtube Live!

Just finished watching Youtube Live!.

Airing from San Francisco (supposedly included Tokyo but don't know where that came in), it was Youtube's first online live streaming show.

But while the effort was good, the show itself left much to be desired. Thought the set-up wasn't half as amateurish as I had expected and that production values were pretty good. Watching alone, you could simultaneously opt for views at the mainstage, backstage and offstage.

Akon who closed the two hour or so show was ok, but the real attraction for me was Joe Satriani, Katy Perry, will.i.am, the Mythbusters and the Happy Tree Friends. Woohoo!!! Kudos also to the Parkour crew as well as Jon Chu's League of Extraordinary Dancers who rocked the show.

Also prominent Youtubers like Fred Figglehorn and Bo Burnham as well as Funtwo who joined Satriani on the axe made the show pretty awesome! Charlie The Unicorn was a riot too (Youtube has gone into maintainence mode!).

The rest of the show was made up of massive no-talent Youtube losers that just wasted time like William Sledd, Michael Buckley among many others, especially Youtube's biggest crime to society, that loser Soulja Boy Tellem. Puke! Hurl!

I'd rather watch the painful rantings of Chris Crocker.

Katy Perry - hot or cold... and whether she kisses a girl.. she is one hot cookie!


Loser patrol! They got the crappiest Youtubers to host the show


Kneel before the greatness of Joe Satriani!


will.i.am - not so good performing live.. but still inspirational.


Katy with Bo during his performance


The Happy Tree Friends!

If you missed the live streaming, you can still catch it by CLICKING HERE! And no, unfortunately I don't think you get the forward option still with the crap hosts and performers.

Oh and check out the presentation of the Youtube Visionary Award to Queen Rania of Jordan. She rocks! Funny!

Now back to my new obsession. With the end of America's Next Top Model, I can now focus back again on Stylista, a new reality show that searches for a junior editor for Elle - think reality show version of Devil Wears Prada. Produced again by Ken Mok (this dude rocks for his work) it's quite interesting and provides MASSIVE drama. And we all love that don't we. I'm this close to making the voodoo dolls of Kate and Megan.



Now bac to my lay Sunday routine...

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Blues over white

Are you a vagitarian? (no I did not spell that wrong) If so you in deep shit. But read for yourself by CLICKING HERE on the Malaysian Department of Islamic Development's (Jakim) explanation on the fatwa or religious ruling made a month ago on butch women in the paper today.

Carpet munchers, beware! They beginning the witch hunt.



Erm... I reserve any comments on the issue. And for those affected, I would say find your inner peace to deal with this. But try not falling back on yoga, cause the National Fatwa Council has made the announcement that they have ruled that yoga is haram for Muslims.



So it's obvious I have too much time to catch up with reading the rags. Ni baru balik my cousin's wedding reception. Gawd... weddings used to be beautiful for me. Now they're just bloody depressing. Just sets me off into the blues.

And I'm not even talking about the bad decor, the horrible dress sense of guests or the rude behaviour of those who have had one too many drinks.

Though the decor was pretty bad at the venue just now.

Exhibit A - Abuse of lampu lip lap sana sini.. of all colours!


Exhibit B - Lanterns fashioned into bug zappers


Exhibit C - archway... tacky


Exhibit D - someone decided to recycle fugly Christmas decor


Still dinner wasn't too bad, plus I am happy for my cousin. He and his blushing bride make for a good couple, so congrats cuz!



Headed home with my folks and felt too buggered lazy to go out walaopon cam bosan. Bluesy... maybe it's just the wedding getting me down. It's hard to be single at 32. But I remind myself, I'd rather be alone than be lonely with someone as I've been before. Besides I have so much I have yet to achieve, so focus is a priority...

So maybe things aren't all that bad...

Watching the finale of America's Next Top Model Cycle 11 which I've been trying to find time to watch. Yeay! McKey Sullivan won!



Just a bit of a bummer she wasn't up against Analeigh for the final, cause I thought Sam was just a yawn. Tengok muka dia cam Whitney pun ada. Nothing special. Now if my other favourites like McKey like Lauren Brie or Elina had not been eliminated, things would have made for a better climax to the end of the season.

Tried a marathon of all the cycles of Britain's Next Top Model just to pass time, but this version is so crap, I quit after one episode. And I thought the Australian one was a bore. At least I've watched that in its entirety.
When does the next season of Project Runway US and Australia start already...

Friday, November 21, 2008

Yak of God

Semalam stress abih! Had to rush for a meeting, tapi akibatnya caught in the crazy downpour. Supposed flash floods in Puchong, Subang and Shah Alam nya pasal, the whole NKVE, MRR2, NPE, KESAS and whatever acronyms and expressways semua stuffed cam tauhu sumbat.

I spent over two hours in the car for no bloody reason. Road tax, toll charges, and such, and yet, this is what development brings - wasted hours of my life I can never regain. Woohoo!!! Great road planning, dicks!

Dari terang...


Sampai gelap!


When it comes to Malaysian roads kan, one great mystery will be - why the F**K does it get like this every time it bloody rains???!!!

Blame it on the yak!

Holy cow! I mean... yak of God!


Yes, this is no ordinary yak! This is the yak mentioned endlessly by one former minister everytime some blame needs shifting. Yes, people, you've heard him say before, that "It's a yak of God!" everytime ujan la, tanah runtuh la tuh la ni la.. thank the yak that he's no longer in office then eh?

Matilah Amir dok nunggu. Don't blame me dude! The yak is one helluva concrete excuse! All I can say to you is - MAKA TERIMALAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!! (matilah gelak sorang-sorang)

Oh nevermind... just ranting...

Pas abih meeting, aku rush back home. Tired actually plus esoknya ada meeting kat RTM awal. Reached home flipped on TV to watch Faz yang ada live interview at Astro Awani. I don't think anyone was amused by the anchor and her erm... in depth research and vast knowledge pasal erm... nothing? Kalau Syazwan jadik host da takde problem da.. ni lak cam bebudak darjah empat skill interview dia. And she was blubbering about, and so obvious tak wat homework.




Had a nice and recuperative sleep and awal da bangun tuk ke RTM. Strange things you see in government buildings. Check this out.



Ok. Now the poser is this. Sapa la nak angkat meja berat n. Kalao ye pon nak rompak, takkan la furniture berat camni jadi target. Not to mention it's an ugly coffee table.

But the clincher is the fact that siap tulis ngan liquid paper tuh - Hak Milik Kerajaan. Yeah right... that wil really stop people from stealing it. It's like "Wow! Check out that ugly and very heavy coffee table! Let's grab it... oh wait! It's written in liquid paper tuh... kansel la nak kebas".

As if.

Headed back home, rested and had to go to reception for my cousin. Esok dia nak kahwin. Aiyo... bosan siot.

Aku tension kalao ada family gathering. No surprises but I don't fit in the typical suburban ideals my extended family probably has. Aku cuma ngan beberapa cousin aku yang memang pala gila cam aku je. Uncles aunties aku semua ok kot... tapi erm.. entah la.. malaih den nak layan.

And then sebab ada the other side of the family (cousin aku ni my mother's side, so I'm referring sedara mara belah bapak dia la) pandang aku semacam je. Well, I guess, a heavily tattood and pierced freakshow would attract attention. Yawn...



I think I spent more time lepaking kat luar isap rokok than anything.

Tapi seronok layan anak buah gak la. Ni ada sorang, daughter my cousin ni. Comel gila. Tiap kali dia nampak camera, mak aih.. pose tak hengat! Little vain pot... seb baik cute.

My mom, my cousin and my niece


Tuh dia! Kecik kecik da pantang tengok camera pose ala "Do You Want To Be On Top!" gituh


Gerak ngan my dad awal, my mom lepak lagik, cousin aku yang hantar balik umah. Aku up and headed to Rasta dinner ngan Faz.

Banyak gak nak discuss and sembang. Ada something funny happened but not putting it down here. Heh... sigh... me tired of so many things. Camna la... aduh... I sometimes feel like I'm so ready to quit it all.